Hector Lannible confesses “I’m guilty”
If bringing delight and treasured memories to millions of satisfied wine drinkers is a crime; I confess, then I’m guilty.
But my plea is for forgiveness of the multiple charges. Why??
- Providing a range of wines to suit all budgets, and over-delivering on quality aspects – not restricted to pricing, packaging, distribution, but even the container contents!
- Fully supporting diversity within our company, noting
- We employ MBA’s from 27 different universities
- 47 employees have honorary degrees (I only have 2)
- 117 different languages are spoken by our employees, contractors and outsourced entities
- Our employees have published numerous scholarly articles, and several novels
- Degrees include accountancy, journalism, media, logistics, jurisprudence, statistics, commerce, advertising, engineering – even science and agriculture!
- We operate through 14 different time-zones
- New markets in 2017 include Nigeria, Venezuela and Cambodia
- Our in-house courses are notorious throughout the industry
- We are committed to family values – no meetings begin before 7am, and none commence after 6pm
- A high proportion of our workforce is voluntarily employed on a sessional or commission basis
- Our financial strategies are outstanding; our associated entities are located in Mauritius, Luxembourg, Bermuda, the British Virgin Islands, and Jersey
- Progressive policies and initiatives, including
- Meaningful reward and recognition, including certificates; and substantive financial incentives for senior executives
- Zero tolerance for “whistle-blowers”
- Environmental – reducing our carbon footstamp progressively
If some bleeding-heart politically-correct mental pygmies like to attack tall poppies out of jealousy, so be it. I am proud of Stoney Goose Ridge. As previously headlined, I’m guilty of all of the above. And I’m fully prepared (along with our happy shareholders) to accept responsibility. Guilty as charged.
But today, I’m delighted to launch our newest fresh set of wines– Emoh Ruo.
“Emoh Ruo” has its origins completely shrouded in mystery; is it derived from one of the unique Aboriginal languages? Is it a relic from one of the many obscure dialects spoken by our numerous migrants? What does it mean? Linguists and cryptographers are baffled. How has this historic phrase infiltrated across the Australian nation, from outback to suburbia? It resonates powerfully.
But whatever the pedigree, we’ve proudly adopted this memorable, essentially dinkum true-blue Aussie vernacular; for those occasions where a quality wine is mandatory but the budget has to be tempered; Emoh Ruo Wild Paddock Red; and Emoh Ruo Open Plains White fit magically into the casual Australian life-style zeitgeist. With an RRP of $7.95, Stoney Goose Ridge has repeatedly shouldered the burden to nail the mark.
Stoney Goose Ridge has monster ambitions for these brand line extensions; there are already strains on the availability of source material to match our sales targets – and we do not compromise on quality; where necessary, in export markets we may source some material from outside Australia. This will exercise my incisive marketing talents – should there be Emoh Ruo Wild Pastures? Is it Emoh Ruo Prairie? Such decisions are weighty and have a direct bearing on the quantum of my bonuses. But as CEO and in my adjunct role as Global Brand Ambassador, fortunately I have the power and insight to guarantee success.
Our striking range of support material for Emoh Ruo encompasses bunting, posters, standees, balloons, archway columns and headers, corflute signage, ticket heads, shelf stripping, inserts, pens, badges, magnets, cups and other POS necessities. Plus our usual support for YOY sales increases, incentive bonuses, shadow shopping rewards, volume inducements, multiple customer competitions, and our suite of modern social media direct one-to-one targeted pin-point marketing, As ever, I will scrutinise our SEO and SEM analytics microscopically.
I repeat – I’m heavily guilty of success, not just in sales, but in leadership talent co-efficients, concern for staff welfare, and overall brand growth munificence.
Emoh Ruo adds to the corporate lustre of Stoney Goose Ridge and slots incisively into our carefully positioned suite of beverage product offerings.
Emoh Ruo Wild Paddock Red; and Emoh Ruo Open Plains White are available from nearly all fine wine outlets with an RRP of $7.95.